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Ratty
Putting the She in Sheds
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or wearing frayed jeans whilst welding and setting fire to your knee. ahem.
oh and btw he really was a trained tree surgeon and very good..and he did wear safety gear when at work properly but seemed to think his own woods were safe!
(and come to think of it...he's not a jeans sort of bloke, they were prob moleskins...not that they would help much!) but hey, we've all been stupid at times or this thread wouldn't be bursting at the seams with tales of woe and idiocy.
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All of these make my incidents seem rather minor. The most recent one (just last night) gave me rather a fright than anything serious. I got my hands on an incredibly cheap briggs and stratton motor in the weekend, perfectly suitable for my next project. Given the price, of course it wasn't going. Being the spring chicken that I am, I scratched my head over the funny looking carb and magneto ignition, thinking that it looked nothing like any fuel injection setup I'd ever seen. After getting my head around it, I realised that the reason for it not going was that it wouldn't spark, so I spent some time cleaning up the points and armature and soon enough, got a good healthy spark. I put it all back together and tried starting it. Off it went! Since I had it bolted to my wooden workbench, I didn't want it running too long, to keep it from heating up and burning through the bench, so I closed the control on the carb. Still going. Not good, I thought. So I did what made sense, I pulled the (rather untidy looking) spark plug lead off. WHACK! I almost got knocked over from the shock and couldn't move my arm for about 10 minutes. Apparently I smelled like burnt toast. Not fun.
I'm reasonably careful with things that can make a mess of me. My brother on the other hand is a little more adventurous. When I bought my welder, he just had to have a play. I told him it was an el cheapo one and didn't go low enough to do panel steel. He just had to prove me wrong. He grabbed a couple of wrecked panels from a crashed damaged car I have, sat them together, earthed them and grabbed the torch. "Why can't I get an arc?" he said. I told him that since he was earthed to paint and trying to weld to paint, he probably wouldn't get an arc. To this he replied that my welder must be really gutless. He scratched some paint off for the earth and a bit to start an arc on. So, he got going and welded the panel steel quite happily. Burning off the paint and sucking in the fumes, with bare arms and wearing a short sleeved synthetic shirt, watching the arc quite intently without any eye protection. After telling him repeatedly that he should be at least looking away if he insists on not using the helmet that was right beside him, he tells me that he's fine, it won't cause any problem with his eyes. Then he got up and tried to walk out the door, but walked straight into the wall instead.
I'm reasonably careful with things that can make a mess of me. My brother on the other hand is a little more adventurous. When I bought my welder, he just had to have a play. I told him it was an el cheapo one and didn't go low enough to do panel steel. He just had to prove me wrong. He grabbed a couple of wrecked panels from a crashed damaged car I have, sat them together, earthed them and grabbed the torch. "Why can't I get an arc?" he said. I told him that since he was earthed to paint and trying to weld to paint, he probably wouldn't get an arc. To this he replied that my welder must be really gutless. He scratched some paint off for the earth and a bit to start an arc on. So, he got going and welded the panel steel quite happily. Burning off the paint and sucking in the fumes, with bare arms and wearing a short sleeved synthetic shirt, watching the arc quite intently without any eye protection. After telling him repeatedly that he should be at least looking away if he insists on not using the helmet that was right beside him, he tells me that he's fine, it won't cause any problem with his eyes. Then he got up and tried to walk out the door, but walked straight into the wall instead.
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hope health and saftey isnt reading this any of this thread
A few years ago i was working on a demolition job, welding covers over manholes untel they were dug and backfield, lid down, the next think i remmber was was wakeing up flat on the floor about 20yards from where i started, A 20 ton 360 had apparently spun round full pelt hiting me square with bucket, 2 broken ribs and a fortnight off work that one.
one of the farm workers down the road was havesting in the summer, he stoped the front of the machine and pulled up to empty the tank of grain into a waiting trailer, he called the student up to the cab and told him when his tank was empty to flick "that switch to turn the augers off he was going to clear the dust from the windows, he was purched out front when the tank began to run out so the student did what he was asked only to get the wrong switch and turn the front of the machine on, he lost an arm and spent 6 months in hospital recovering from serious cuts and lasarations, the only thing that saved him was his steal toe cap which eventualy jammed the elevator and made the slip cluch go.
A few years ago i was working on a demolition job, welding covers over manholes untel they were dug and backfield, lid down, the next think i remmber was was wakeing up flat on the floor about 20yards from where i started, A 20 ton 360 had apparently spun round full pelt hiting me square with bucket, 2 broken ribs and a fortnight off work that one.
one of the farm workers down the road was havesting in the summer, he stoped the front of the machine and pulled up to empty the tank of grain into a waiting trailer, he called the student up to the cab and told him when his tank was empty to flick "that switch to turn the augers off he was going to clear the dust from the windows, he was purched out front when the tank began to run out so the student did what he was asked only to get the wrong switch and turn the front of the machine on, he lost an arm and spent 6 months in hospital recovering from serious cuts and lasarations, the only thing that saved him was his steal toe cap which eventualy jammed the elevator and made the slip cluch go.
Cappy
Would be Luthier
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Though I will admit to the odd minor accident like breaking the 'golden rule' when using a chisel which is,"Both hands behind the cutting edge" and after 40 odd years of remembering finally taking a slice out of my left index finger knuckle, when trying to be just a bit too quick.
My old company used to send round the Group accident reports -as examples for us all to learn from
A real classic was the mixer driver who at the end of the day was filling up his mixer lorriy, ready for the next day. Now I know it's a diesel but the process of filling generates a highly inflammable mist in the tank. Unable to see what the level was he held his cigarette lighter over the top of the tank, he was killed and his mate finished up in hospital severely burned. All this in spite of the very large 'NO SMOKING' signs -what can anyone do ???
Or the 'expert' who came to clear a shell (ordanance type) lodged in the Dredge Pump. He very carefully cleaned the shell until he could identify the markings, comparing them with the nubers in his 'little black book'. Deciding it was a practice shell and totally safe he asked for the oxy-acetylene torch to cut it out. Not long afterwards there was large explosion, no expert and not much dredge pump.
Never pays to take chances - huh ???
The 'one minute' risk assessment is well worth it. Stop and Think
Take care out there.
My old company used to send round the Group accident reports -as examples for us all to learn from
A real classic was the mixer driver who at the end of the day was filling up his mixer lorriy, ready for the next day. Now I know it's a diesel but the process of filling generates a highly inflammable mist in the tank. Unable to see what the level was he held his cigarette lighter over the top of the tank, he was killed and his mate finished up in hospital severely burned. All this in spite of the very large 'NO SMOKING' signs -what can anyone do ???
Or the 'expert' who came to clear a shell (ordanance type) lodged in the Dredge Pump. He very carefully cleaned the shell until he could identify the markings, comparing them with the nubers in his 'little black book'. Deciding it was a practice shell and totally safe he asked for the oxy-acetylene torch to cut it out. Not long afterwards there was large explosion, no expert and not much dredge pump.
Never pays to take chances - huh ???
The 'one minute' risk assessment is well worth it. Stop and Think
Take care out there.
rtbcomp
Moderator
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Too true, we'd just installed a Residual Current Circuit Breaker, a novelty at the time, and my boss, with an electronics degree, was going to test it by putting his fingers accross live & neutral!
Much to the annoyance of my workmates I managed to stop him in time.
marknotgeorge
Doing sums for a living since 2009.
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The worst I can remember was when I worked at McDonalds, cleaning a bun toaster. Now these are more like grills - The buns go on a tray, and the toaster platen pulls down onto the buns.
They need cleaning once a week or so, and I was moving the toaster out of the way - the chemical used gives off unpleasant fumes. It was an older toaster, with no locking mechanism on the platen, and I wasn't wearing proective gloves (toasters and grills need to be cleaned when hot). So it hurt when the platen came down on the heel of my hand.
They need cleaning once a week or so, and I was moving the toaster out of the way - the chemical used gives off unpleasant fumes. It was an older toaster, with no locking mechanism on the platen, and I wasn't wearing proective gloves (toasters and grills need to be cleaned when hot). So it hurt when the platen came down on the heel of my hand.
I came very close some years ago to a nasty accident. We drove to Spain in a Suzuki SJ410 with a friend in an SJ413, off roading along the way. We were just coming down out of the Pyranees into Spain, down a long straight road so IU'd built up a good head of speed, my mate went and overtook an artic, I pulled out to do the same, saw something coming, pulled back in and braked and promptly went back out again as the brakes only seemed to be working on one side. We stopped in a field, wheels off up on two jacks rebuilding the front brkes when the jack sunk into the ground and the whole thing slid sideways off the jacks, fortunately neither of us was under it at the time and we'd stuck the wheels under the chassis rails so it didn't quite hit the ground but it was a right barsteward to get jacked up again as the ground was quite soft.
As a kid I got a good 240V belt, was before my dad had rewired upstairs and we had the old unshielded round pin plugs, I crawled under the bed to plug the hoover in and caught my finger behind the plug, BANG, Crack, blue flash, the worst thing was my hair stood on end and got caught up in the old bed spring so I lost a biggish clump when I shot backwards.
As a kid I got a good 240V belt, was before my dad had rewired upstairs and we had the old unshielded round pin plugs, I crawled under the bed to plug the hoover in and caught my finger behind the plug, BANG, Crack, blue flash, the worst thing was my hair stood on end and got caught up in the old bed spring so I lost a biggish clump when I shot backwards.
bill_gj
Tired and irritable
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Well, today started poorly as my working days do now.
I 'work' for a multinational that now does the majority of its design work by committee and then gets its suppliers to do the interesting stuff.
Hence, fossils like me, that like to do a bit of sleeves-up work are viewed as useless appendages by the gel-haired geniuses that think stuff is made out of paper.
That was until I logged into mig-welding and had a scan of the recent posts to see if there was something more interesting to read than the usual Company-sh*te that fills my mailbox.
And here it was.
Putting aside the stories about tragic deaths and truly nasty injury, which I would never wish on anyone, I would like to thank all contributors for giving me a good laugh this morning.
One or two of my colleagues have been giving me strange looks owing to the stifled laughing that's been going on while I read some of the accounts.
There is nothing quite like a smoking boots story to make you smirk on an otherwise boring (very boring) day. Many thanks to you all for your stories.
I have a few stories of stupidity, but just the ordinary stuff that involves:
- screwdrivers and the palm of your hand
- chainsaws and falling trees
- garage inspection pits and rotten cover boards
- Evo-stik (started off as a gluing project and ended up as recreation drug use)
I can tell you the story of a fitter that was building a diesel engine for dynamometer testing. He was doing a leak test on each cylinder use high pressure (very high pressure) nitrogen from a battery of full-size bottles.
The procedure was to lock the crank with a fixture so that the piston was at top dead centre, then pressurise with gas at megapressure and note the leak-down time.
Unfortunately, he had become a little distracted and had forgotten to attach the fixture properly. Hence, shortly after the test pressure was reached, the unlocked crank turned, the piston shot down the bore and came to an abrupt stop at bottom dead centre, nitrogen continued to flow and the cylinder/block exploded, showering the shop with bits of cast iron.
He was deaf for a bit and I think he had a nasty dry cleaning bill.
Mad as a box of frogs.
Once again, please accept my thanks, Smoking Boots Stories forever.
I 'work' for a multinational that now does the majority of its design work by committee and then gets its suppliers to do the interesting stuff.
Hence, fossils like me, that like to do a bit of sleeves-up work are viewed as useless appendages by the gel-haired geniuses that think stuff is made out of paper.
That was until I logged into mig-welding and had a scan of the recent posts to see if there was something more interesting to read than the usual Company-sh*te that fills my mailbox.
And here it was.
Putting aside the stories about tragic deaths and truly nasty injury, which I would never wish on anyone, I would like to thank all contributors for giving me a good laugh this morning.
One or two of my colleagues have been giving me strange looks owing to the stifled laughing that's been going on while I read some of the accounts.
There is nothing quite like a smoking boots story to make you smirk on an otherwise boring (very boring) day. Many thanks to you all for your stories.
I have a few stories of stupidity, but just the ordinary stuff that involves:
- screwdrivers and the palm of your hand
- chainsaws and falling trees
- garage inspection pits and rotten cover boards
- Evo-stik (started off as a gluing project and ended up as recreation drug use)
I can tell you the story of a fitter that was building a diesel engine for dynamometer testing. He was doing a leak test on each cylinder use high pressure (very high pressure) nitrogen from a battery of full-size bottles.
The procedure was to lock the crank with a fixture so that the piston was at top dead centre, then pressurise with gas at megapressure and note the leak-down time.
Unfortunately, he had become a little distracted and had forgotten to attach the fixture properly. Hence, shortly after the test pressure was reached, the unlocked crank turned, the piston shot down the bore and came to an abrupt stop at bottom dead centre, nitrogen continued to flow and the cylinder/block exploded, showering the shop with bits of cast iron.
He was deaf for a bit and I think he had a nasty dry cleaning bill.
Mad as a box of frogs.
Once again, please accept my thanks, Smoking Boots Stories forever.
andrewg1323
Member
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Ha Ha top thread
The diesel one above reminds me of a memo sent round when i worked in a petrol station
To cut a long story short over in ireland a coupla blokes filled a car up with the wrong fuel, wasnt too much of a problem as they had a plan! They pushed the car to the on-site vacuum and decided to take the fuel out! Apparently they were both in hospital with quite severe burns
The diesel one above reminds me of a memo sent round when i worked in a petrol station
To cut a long story short over in ireland a coupla blokes filled a car up with the wrong fuel, wasnt too much of a problem as they had a plan! They pushed the car to the on-site vacuum and decided to take the fuel out! Apparently they were both in hospital with quite severe burns
Cappy
Would be Luthier
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Ratty
Putting the She in Sheds
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Sorry folks, off thread for a sec
Ratty, how did you insert those smilies into the text???????????
Si
hmmm..not sure I should tell. Oh what the heck..call me anal
...I uploaded them (having previously downloaded to my computer like wot you told me) into a private album in the gallery area then added them in as I would a photo. Couldn't get the rofl one to be animated sadly. Let me know if you work that one out. Or alternately, tell me to go get a life
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Drains
Yeah, nah.
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For a little more chucklage, this is worth a peek. More about the avoidance of accidents... sort of...
http://www.dclab.com/qantas_mechanics_humor.asp
Many of you will probably have seen it, it's on the net everywhere. Still makes me laff tho.
Si
http://www.dclab.com/qantas_mechanics_humor.asp
Many of you will probably have seen it, it's on the net everywhere. Still makes me laff tho.
Si
Feeding a roll of sheet steel (2mm thick) into electric rollers to straighten it, lost concentration for a second... took hand with it. In complete desperation put other hand in at the rear of the rollers, trying to push it back out. By that time (hearing all the screams) the works foreman had dashed over, pressing the reverse.... and other hand taken in from the back!
OUCH!
Not me (thank F**k!) a guy I used to work with. Needed extensive rebuilding surgery to his hands - and still continued in the sheet metal game!
weldequip
OUCH!
Not me (thank F**k!) a guy I used to work with. Needed extensive rebuilding surgery to his hands - and still continued in the sheet metal game!
weldequip
Ratty
Putting the She in Sheds
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Me too
told you you weren't paying attention Si...look at the post just before that one you did above
Haze
is it can be hugs tiem ?
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i feel sick from some of these tales...
still ive been lucky so far, worst ive managed to do is smash myself in the face with some 40" stillsons while up a ladder and then crash down to lie out of for a bit...
a friend of mine fell on a meat skewer a few years back, it penetrated his lower palm and exited behind his elbow.... cant even bare thinking about that ..
still ive been lucky so far, worst ive managed to do is smash myself in the face with some 40" stillsons while up a ladder and then crash down to lie out of for a bit...
a friend of mine fell on a meat skewer a few years back, it penetrated his lower palm and exited behind his elbow.... cant even bare thinking about that ..
Drains
Yeah, nah.
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That's just acupuncture.... good for you!
Ratty
Putting the She in Sheds
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Just remembered another one, more a nasty incident than accident, aged about 14 my pet rat was looking a bit unwell so I put him in a box in my bedroom. He got better in the night and I was woken with a searing pain in the region of my eye, grabbed for the light and the rat let go. I had a bite mark above and below my eye and over the next few days developed the best shiner you've ever seen. I was actually expelled from my french class for LYING as my teacher didn't believe my explanation...probably thought I'd been fighting. She had to apologise later. Pah. I could start a whole new thread on animal related incidents/accidents..and have the scars to prove them 
rtbcomp
Moderator
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Pah. I could start a whole new thread on animal related incidents/accidents..and have the scars to prove them
I got bitten by a mink and a red streak developed down my arm. The foreman advised me to go to hospital so I jumped on my pushbike and off I went.
I was duly given an anti tetanus jab - in my backside so I had to limp the five miles home pushing the bike
The mink came off worse - after it was pelted its skull was mounted in the office with its mouth stuffed with its genetalia.
