weldvandal
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I think you deserve to give yourself a pat on the back, you cannot control everything in life but the main point is you're doing alright which is better than a lot of people could manage to do
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redlig
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Tried them a few times and it almost makes an ' event 'out of cooking a meal and so far not had a failure .
Onoff
In the land of the unfinished project I am King!
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bigegg
Scream Not Working Because Space Make Deaf
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That's simply not true.
Both my sister, and my son are allergic to onions.
They cannot tolerate anything with the slightest amount in.
My sister subsisted on boiled potatoes and baked beans for years until we found out what the issue was.
Luckily for my son, I recognised the signs early so already knew how to "cook around it".
bigegg
Scream Not Working Because Space Make Deaf
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@ukracer
It sounds to me as though you are taking too much on.
Give yourself a break - It is OK to say "I can't cope" - acknowledge it, and deal with it. At the moment it sounds like you're trying to "battle through". It is NOT going to work for long. Something will give. And it will probably be *your* health
you are not doing yourself any favours, and things are going to be much worse for your family if you put yourself in hospital.
Not easy, I realise, but it's something I've had to learn recently looking after mum.
Mum comes first, then me; kids, grandkids, and exMrsEgg are third.
if I don't feel up to it, then it's a hard "no!".
It sounds to me as though you are taking too much on.
Give yourself a break - It is OK to say "I can't cope" - acknowledge it, and deal with it. At the moment it sounds like you're trying to "battle through". It is NOT going to work for long. Something will give. And it will probably be *your* health
you are not doing yourself any favours, and things are going to be much worse for your family if you put yourself in hospital.
Not easy, I realise, but it's something I've had to learn recently looking after mum.
Mum comes first, then me; kids, grandkids, and exMrsEgg are third.
if I don't feel up to it, then it's a hard "no!".
Sadly it's got worse today.
My sons father in law has had a suspected stroke.
Seemed OK but then got worse quite quickly.
Same happened to my mom, but we never really knew how bad she was due to banned visiting. Then people wonder why I can't stand the guy who's father has just become a French citizen because of puppy dog and called exactly what the Met Police would find.
Corruption at its very heart.
Edit: son has just posted an update. "Yep defo he can’t stand up and still had no feeling in fingers and can’t lift arm he can slightly but not past his elbow height and still not making sentences they have fitted a cafter so he’s stuck in the bed atm"
addjunkie
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Sad news but dont forget with all these going ons with others, you been a grandad your sliding up the que to having health issues. All the more reason to manage the situation to reduce stress on you.
As I said above I just purchased a 150 quid soup maker, with a view to enable my wife to cook (she actually loves it but it's even harder trying to help her than doing it myself.)You need a gas hob in the workshop or garden and make stews a lotwin win for u and the missis.
HERE'S HOPING IT'S WORTH IT. Lol
addjunkie
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Afterstorm Arwen when we were on the generator for 6 days, with out our cooker. We bought. Foodie Ninja, runs off plug and even I can use it!
May I suggest giving a meal kit company a try. We started using hello fresh boxes and it massively improved our evenings. Everything is portioned for you so no measuring or thinking about ingredients. Just pick the numbered bag for the day out the fridge. They are simple to cook and decent varied food.
You select the meals in advance and once the weekly box arrives you can choose the meals for the week. That way you and your wife are both prepared for what you eat each night. No arguments. It has made the evenings far more enjoyable. And it's amazing how much less of a chore it makes cooking. Especially when they are nice varied meals.
And hopefully being as the meals are half prepared for you and you have already agreed in advance between you and wife the meals then it can reduce stress whilst keeping everyone happy.
You select the meals in advance and once the weekly box arrives you can choose the meals for the week. That way you and your wife are both prepared for what you eat each night. No arguments. It has made the evenings far more enjoyable. And it's amazing how much less of a chore it makes cooking. Especially when they are nice varied meals.
And hopefully being as the meals are half prepared for you and you have already agreed in advance between you and wife the meals then it can reduce stress whilst keeping everyone happy.
To be honest it might sound I take on too much but I have enforced breaks now.
That's my current view.
Apart from the bad news about sons father in law we had some good news about someone wanting some things made out of steel.... And involves welding, which is good for a welding forum
In fact if there are any fabricators on here who would be prepared to guide me on a realistic price I will PM them further details.
redlig
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Don't forget that the most important person in your 'group' is the CARER. Look after yourself first otherwise you can't look after the others. Easy to say difficult to do. As one who worked in that sector for 10 years before retirement I've seen it . The light at the end of the tunnel just might NOT be a train coming towards you.
blackolive (Ste)
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I think we all have spells where we just get on with our lot, and then suddenly it all gets a bit much, and we feel put on, unloved, and taken for granted. Don’t worry about time for projects and what other people are achieving, sometimes we just need to chill out when we have the opportunity 
northwest
Searching for the Holy Grail.........
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If nothing else, this is probably the single most important thing to take away from this thread. Taking care of yourself is not being selfish, it is surviving. Many, many people don't even see it.
I totally get that but, that's not a dislike that's an allergic reaction. I know someone who has exactly the same with garlic, she likes garlic but can't have anything with it in because it makes her ill
That is totally different to someone saying "I don't like cheese" or "I don't like vegetables". Nobody is born with those dislikes it is simply something that has been allowed to develop. If you watch a parent who doesn't like something with their children they often instill these things without realising, firstly because they never serve it and secondly because they will always leave it if served to them. We live in a world of convenience where it's all too easy to take the easy solutions. It's a slow but steady process, parents having different meals to the kids, kids having nuggets/pizza and chips.
If you any kind of reaction to something then it's virtually impossible to have any kind of pre-prepared food because often trace amounts of these things exist in the most bizarre places. Onion and garlic are massively common ingredients.
bigegg
Scream Not Working Because Space Make Deaf
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My sister was about 2? 3? years old, saying "don't like onions" "don't like gravy".
You can't simply say a child of that age has been taught to dislike a food - they may have a perfectly valid reason for that "dislike", and not just "taught to dislike".
The _only_ food I can't tolerate is instant mash - dunno why, the smell literally makes me vomit.
My sister likes it.
We were brought up the same - so how come I was "taught" to hate instant mash, and she wasn't? (If what you are saying is correct?)
Oh: "I don't like cheese".
I've always preferred unbuttered bread, and "mature" cheese - not to a point of "dislike", but as a preference.
I found out in my 30s, that I'm lactose intolerant.
"I don't like cheese" could be mild lactose intolerance. "I don't like veg" could be sore teeth (chewing) or IBS.
My point is: there are lots of possible reasons for a "dislike".
Onoff
In the land of the unfinished project I am King!
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Generally the way it's cooked here...
redlig
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Everyone to his own but the people that wind me up are the ones that " I don't like that" and when asked if they have ever tried it say "no but I know I wouldn't like it" FFS give it a taste and then make a judgement. Sheep's eyes excepted .My sister was about 2? 3? years old, saying "don't like onions" "don't like gravy".
You can't simply say a child of that age has been taught to dislike a food - they may have a perfectly valid reason for that "dislike", and not just "taught to dislike".
The _only_ food I can't tolerate is instant mash - dunno why, the smell literally makes me vomit.
My sister likes it.
We were brought up the same - so how come I was "taught" to hate instant mash, and she wasn't? (If what you are saying is correct?)
Oh: "I don't like cheese".
I've always preferred unbuttered bread, and "mature" cheese - not to a point of "dislike", but as a preference.
I found out in my 30s, that I'm lactose intolerant.
"I don't like cheese" could be mild lactose intolerance. "I don't like veg" could be sore teeth (chewing) or IBS.
My point is: there are lots of possible reasons for a "dislike".
