Gazebo thing

[stuvy]

I built this today with my brother in law and dad

what really got to me was how slow the old man was and how he wasn’t as sharp thinking like he used to be. Really broke my heart whilst standing on the ladder asking him for a few more nails to do the roof part.

on the upside my sister is seriously happy and did a brilliant bbq for dinner

the only downer was it was £1700 and rubbish parts, some are really warped or damaged as we opened the pallet

 

[Ashley Burton]

£1700 to buy that!

 

[Parm]

Mate, the old boys get like that. Just be pleased he’s getting involved and helping out

Just factor in that extra time will be required and the odd thing may go wrong

 

[tom2207]

You dont stop doing things because you get old ,,,
You get old because you stop doing things .


Its some times not about the end results , its about the shared experience in making some thing , some times its the time shared that has the value , not the end product.

 

[stuvy]

What annoyed me is my nephew is 7 and I initially thought he was at his dads

when he finally came out I bellowed at him and he was suddenly helping my dad his grandad.

when I was his age I’d have been there like a shot looking to help out and hear dirty jokes

 

[Lewis_RX8]

As others have said good to see the man getting involved still keeping his brain ticking over.

when I was his age I’d have been there like a shot looking to help out and hear dirty jokes

Might hear the odd swear word when something cocks up

 

[stuvy]

As others have said good to see the man getting involved still keeping his brain ticking over.



Might hear the odd swear word when something cocks up

with my mum being a dub and my dad born in the sound of the bow bells I’m guessing he’s used to that by now

 

[Olderisbetter]

Having watched lots of people getting older i have noticed that old age is not an illness but it has all the symptoms of one but its better to have had a lot of skills and slow down than to have never had them

 

[addjunkie]

what really got to me was how slow the old man was and how he wasn’t as sharp thinking like he used to be. Really broke my heart whilst standing on the ladder asking him for a few more nails to do the roof part.

I remember noticing that with my old man. Then later when he was dying in hospital, thinking it is a circular progression

You are born and need your parents for everything, your grow towards independance, when you dont need them, maybe only for advice, then the circles starts to turn, they age, and come to you for advice, finally becoming almost reliant on you as the deteriorate in old age.

 

[rtcosic]

As the father of three sons, I must have posted before of that bittersweet moment the first time one of them says 'let me do that Dad, we're in a hurry'.

First occurs around 14 as I recall.

Even worse when you voluntarily step aside and say 'you better do that, it's too heavy, I can't see well enough, I can't get in there.....' That started around my 60th birthday.

My excuse is that at 5' 15/16" I'm the smallest of the 4 of us, and I'm sticking to it!

These days I tend to get relegated to tool fetching and passing, sweeping, cleaning and tidying, de-rusting and painting and those low skilled apprentice jobs. I draw the line at fetching the coffee and cake - they have a mother for that.

As @addjunkie said, the wheel turns back to where it started.

...some times its the time shared that has the value, not the end product.

This, a thousand times over. I can't be doing with this Zoom, Skype, conference call malarky. I've had 20 odd years of random chit chat, passing on of advice, shared experiences by doing 'stuff' with my boys. Unlike my wife, I can't have a telephone call about nothing in particular!

 

[Wallace]

Is the roof plastic sheeting?

 

[eLuSiVeMiTe]

£1700 to buy that!

You say that but price up the timber
Then machine the timber for the rounded edges and finish
Then cut it all to sizes and package it up

I couldn't build you one from scratch for that price

 

[Morrisman]

You say that but price up the timber
Then machine the timber for the rounded edges and finish
Then cut it all to sizes and package it up

I couldn't build you one from scratch for that price

That’s the sad truth most of the time.
I’m currently torn between buying or building a wood workshop. I’d like the experience of doing a wood one, except I’m on my own and it will involve no end of humping and heaving and lift long and clambering about, and I’m not in particularly great fitness any more.

 

[colnerov]

Hi, Yes old age/dementia is insidious and horrible. I was told and noticed a couple of things "You become your parents parent". It's not just the years but also the hours as the day passes and they get tired, the Australians call it 'sundowning'.

Colin

 

[Dieselman 63]

You say that but price up the timber
Then machine the timber for the rounded edges and finish
Then cut it all to sizes and package it up

I couldn't build you one from scratch for that price

Timber is pricey, especially when it’s treated for outdoor use.

 

[Welderpaul]

I remember noticing that with my old man. Then later when he was dying in hospital, thinking it is a circular progression

You are born and need your parents for everything, your grow towards independance, when you dont need them, maybe only for advice, then the circles starts to turn, they age, and come to you for advice, finally becoming almost reliant on you as the deteriorate in old age.

Very true. My Dad lives on his own and is disabled. Over the last 5 years or so he's needed more and more help from me. I don't mind one bit, after all like you put very well, it's like an eventual reversal of role and responsibility.

 

[Morrisman]

Hi, Yes old age/dementia is insidious and horrible. I was told and noticed a couple of things "You become your parents parent". It's not just the years but also the hours as the day passes and they get tired, the Australians call it 'sundowning'.

Colin

My dad was a giant of a man all his life, RAF career, into all the sports, swimming coach, dive judge etc. Now he is 85 and just sits in his armchair, watching tv and drinking scotch, a shadow of the man he used to be.

He taught me loads as I was growing up, but not all were good things.....


I’d feel more empathy for him now if he hadn’t been such an obnoxious, condescending bully of a father in my formative years, but it’s hard to hold that against him now. It is what it is.

I go round and see him quite often, fixed his back gate just yesterday.

Mum is in a care home, been there 12 months now, massive stroke.

 

[slim_boy_fat]

Mate, the old boys get like that. Just be pleased he’s getting involved and helping out

Aye, as the others have said it creeps up on you.

Might hear the odd swear word when something cocks up

And that'll do him no harm at all - he'll experience plenty of that out in the 'real' wide world.

It's almost inevitable that faculties decline with the ageing process, after all....what were we discussing, again..

 

[stuvy]

Is the roof plastic sheeting?

Its the under layer. There is felt tiles to go on top and wood finishing strips

 

[stuvy]

You say that but price up the timber
Then machine the timber for the rounded edges and finish
Then cut it all to sizes and package it up

I couldn't build you one from scratch for that price

it was from dunster house. The instructions are useless and the fit up of the wood is really bad for the money.

mid any one asked me to do another one I’d decline